Early outbursts, late heroics, and characteristic grittiness have the Crows off to a great start.
In a world careening through chaos, it can be reassuring to have a seasonal rhythm that keeps us grounded in the local and ordinary. And so it is with a heart full of innocence and competitiveness that Seattle Wiffleball soldiers into its eighth year. This season began on the first Sunday of May, with an off-day for Mother’s Day and a downpour of a third week, resulting in the first POWER RANKINGS of the year:
Power Rankings After Week Two
- Bilabial Stops (2-0)
The Stops faced some serious hardship this offseason, losing perennial All-Star Nick Usoff to the Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim system, as well as father-son duo Greg and Francis Nyssen. But the great teams don’t rebuild, they reload, and Eddie Brown’s gang showed no intent of slowing down when mowing down the Mighty Knucks in their season debut, while transfer Paul Rogers acquitted himself well on the hill.
- West Coast Washout (2-0)
With the departure of Dan Rish, the new old dad team had to find another starter and another bat for their lineup. Week one gave them some early answers to both, with Jeff Hanschmann handily tying down Chicken ‘n’ Wiffles, while newcomer Cory Smith got knocks at the dish. Their title defense is off to a solid start.
- Sheryl Crows (3-1)
Despite losing ace Paul Rogers to the Bilabial Stops, the Crows have soared to early heights with contact skills at the plate, sound defense in the field, and impressive craftiness on the hill from John Trupin and Grant Bronsdon. Plus they’ve managed to do all this against the veterans on 100% Real Juice and RBI Steaks. Is this the year for Eric Sanford’s squad to BELIEVE?
- Wiffle House (0-0)
They have played no games. Many of their players aren’t even home yet. But when the boys are back in town, the sky's the limit for the brothers McFeely, brothers Thomas, and their posse of unholy athletic terrors. Last year’s runners up will be out for revenge, and now they can pitch. They’ll open their campaign with the Wiffle Iron matchup against Chicken ‘n’ Wiffles.
- 100% Real Juice (1-1)
BABIP giveth, and BABIP taketh away. In game two against the Sheryl Crows, BABIP tooketh away from ace Epo Olivarez with endless seeing-eye singles punctuating his wildness, while BABIP tooketh away some more as every Juice hitter seemed to hit right into a fielder’s choice. Next week they get a chance to prove it was a fluke, against their old rivals in the RBI Steaks.
- RBI Steaks (0-2)
Drawing the short straw in the early season, Jimmy Froio’s jackwagons (his endearing term) were pushed to make their debut in the finest sogginess that Cowen Park has to offer. In compliance with the recent CBA, the League Office is working on a thank you gift to the Steaks for playing in the sog, which may aid their future rallies as they shake off the offseason rust.
- Mighty Knucks (0-2)
Managing a new wave of fathers on his squad, Brandon Williams nevertheless was able to bring a crew together for the Knucks’ season debut. Unfortunately they had to jump right into the fire with the Stops throwing gas all day, and their impromptu rally tree from a branch stabbed into the Cowen mud puddle did not have much effect. They’ll look to get right against Wiffully Ignorant this week.
- Chicken ‘n’ Wiffles (0-2)
It’s not very fun to open the season down two regulars, and it’s even less fun to open it against the defending champions. But these were mere obstacles for Team Fun, who nevertheless enjoyed bringing new folks onto the squad while playing solid defense, even as the pitchers and batters took their lumps. Turning the fun up to 11, this founding team is planning to have jerseys for the first time in their history. Chickens be drippin’.
- Wiffully Ignorant (0-0)
It was a rough first go for Matt Erickson’s Wigs last year, scratching out one win on the campaign. But it is a new year, and after an offseason of reloading the roster with new recruits, better days are still to come. They’ll open their season against the Mighty Knucks this week.
- Skull Knights (0-0)
With his passion for the game rekindled by neighborhood games in quarantine, newcomer Wallace Tillman will be leading up the brand new Knights, built from his own recruits and other rookies getting in contact with the league. It won’t be a very soft landing though, as they’ll square off with the Bilabial Stops in their first go.
Housekeeping item: Captains, please send in your June availability if you haven't already so that we can get the schedule out ASAP!
