The grizzled vets meet the juggernaut upstarts for the title this Sunday!
After months of rain, heat, sweat, and tears, it has come to this. Two teams on two different paths will meet in Cowen Park, at high noon on September 11th. Only one will walk away with the Leaning Golden Man, as our champions for the 2022 season.
(5) SWINGDOME
First our grizzled veterans. A founding member of our league, the former RBI Steaks reached the championship in each of the first three years, finally capturing it in 2017. Once perennial favorites on the backs of overwhelming pitching, they have fallen back towards the pack in recent years, the dust of Cowen mixing with the sands of time. This June was undoubtedly their darkest hour, recording their seventh straight loss to start the season.
But legends never die, they reload. Captain Jimmy Froio recruited two dynamic rookies in Nick [] and Jack Bernstein. Former All-Star pitcher Riley Brindle found his second wind. Quinn MacWatters, Jack Sandstrom, and Mitch Barham started coming up clutch again. Steven McGinley returned from two lost injury years to anchor the infield and the lineup.
Since rallying to qualify for the playoffs, the rebranded Swingdome's run has been absolutely grueling. The Sheryl Crows took them on in the first round, and the result was a slugfest under the hot sun, a knock-down bare-knuckle fight to the end. Crows captain Eric Sanford repeatedly sacrificed his body for his team by hurdling the fence and sliding into bases, with the open shin wounds to prove it. A magnificent first playoff showing for the Crows, but the Dome would not be denied as they secured the pivotal third game in convincing fashion.
As the lowest remaining seed, Swingdome had the displeasure of having to take on the top-seeded Bilabial Stops. But chaos once again broke for the Dome as the Stops found themselves down Captain Eddie Brown, perennial All-Star and two-way killer. The burden weighed heavy upon fellow two-way star Paul Rogers and the rest of the Stops roster, who grabbed the first game with little resistance but found the bullpen thin in games two and three. On the other side of those two games, Brindle was brilliant and the Dome offense came out swinging to clinch a convincing upset.
Swingdome returns to the championship for the first time in five years, their season a huge success by any measure. But playoff upsets are like chicken wings: you don't ever want just one.
(2) WIFFLE HOUSE
Now for our juggernaut upstarts. The House were rookies last year, overcoming a rocky start to secure a wild card berth and a magical run to the championship. Their murderer's lineup and death row defense proved a tough nut to crack, until West Coast Washout took advantage of their merely mortal pitching to take away the Leaning Golden Man in three dynamite games.
This season, the pitching has taken a step forward with wonder twins Sam and Quinn Thomas delivering on the hill. The offense has somehow gotten even better, with Reed McFeely literally leading the charge so that his brother and Captain Liam can hit him in. Their defense is as oppressive as ever, Phil Thomas playing the coolest hot corner while Dustin Diemond and Jasiah Johnstone patrol the outfield.
They rode this potent combination to a first-round bye, during which West Coast Washout and the rookie Skull Knights played a series. Captain Wallace Tillman of the Knights sent out his most potent "cool last name x starting pitcher" duo, Jake VanWolvelaere and Nick Cvitkovic. Despite their filthy movement, neither was able to rein in their control against the patient Washout, who took the series in a crisp two games.
With this first-round outcome, Wiffle House found themselves in a 2021 World Series rematch with the Washout. Their opposing Captain, Jeremy Salvo, crunched the numbers and opted to start his ace Karl Koch and rookie sensation Cory Smith. But the House was ready for these wrinkles, braced for Karl's buckling knuckler and unfazed by Cory's arsenal. Sam shut them down, Quinn held them there, and the rest of the lineup ran them right back into the championship.
Part one of the Wiffle House revenge tour is done, sweeping the season series with the Washout. Part two, if they can get it, would be taking home the hardware.
